I fell in love with an Afghan and it was the best few months of my life. After breaking up with the dad of my son I was lonely ans I met him in college where we were taking AAT classes and he just seem to be there for me.
He was so nice and understanding and listened to my problems infact he was perfect. Too good to be true!! Surely not!
We couldn’t have enough of each other and I opened up to him very quickly and felt at ease even telling him things about my past only my close family members knew. I didn’t know at the time why that was. But he was perfect!!
Things went on like this for around six months when he told me that he is married back home but not by choice and it was in fact the case that he was promised to his cousin when he was just a baby. So he told me anyway. I didn’t think of it much at the time as I thought so no problem he will divorce her come the time. But then just one day thinking about this I thought he must have children with her!!!
When I confronted him maybe just a few days later about having kids he said YES!
Ha had lied to me all along about his personal life. His explanation was that he didn’t want to loose me. And I wouldn’t have gone out with him if I knew. But I had been honest with him all along so why couldn’t he tell me the truth! WHY??
I was heartbroken and after a lot of consideration and talking we still kept seeing each other. He said to give him six months and he will divorce her. Six months came by and went nothing happened.
Oh yes I should have mentioned I am Sikh and that was a problem for him I had to convert to Islam to be with him. I wasn’t going to do that not for him and not for anyone.
Anyhow we settled in the end that I would remain Sikh as I wanted to stick to my religion and why not, if he was not willing to change for me then why should I ??
He never told me much about himself always discrete all I knew was that he served in the army back in Afghanistan. He was also politically involved and wanted to bring a lot of his soldiers back from Afghanistan to U.K.
I don’t know if anyone will ever read this blog but the reason I am writing is that now we are no longer together and I want people to know how manipulative this man is. He can go to some lengths to try to get the girl to love him while he will never as he know his priorities lie back home with his family kids and his wife.
He made me believe we had a future when we did not. He said all the right things to get me to love him. And I did too !!
Please beware of guys like him especially from Afghanistan, they nearly all married back home no matter how young. They will do just about anything to get the girl to sleep with them. you will never be the only girl Jin his life.
He is very charming and will seem like the perfect guy you will ever meet but don’t fall for his charms. I did and I am paying for it. Specially to all my Sikh friends out there please never change your religion for someone as they are by no means bigger than the God you believe in.
They are doing this just to get their rewards in the afterlife!! Makes me sick just thinking about it even now.
There is a possibility that he will be contacted by Ashraf Ghani the president of Afghanistan, and offer him a position in the government. He was so happy when he was telling me this and I thought ok so you are going to go back to Afghanistan then? And he said yes !!
Ofcourse why would you turn down such an offer. I must be an idiot to think he would be with me. But hang on, what he said to me was that his life was in the UK and he will never leave UK. And now he will go back to Afghanistan where I could never accompany him with my son as my sons father would never permit him to go. And to be honest why should he it’s not the country where I would ever want to go. So I ended the relationship !! And he did not say a word, nothing to say that we can work things out but it was like he wasn’t bothered that I ended the relationship.
Just to summarise what has happened was what started as a beautiful relationship with a single loving caring person ended up being a married man with three kids who was liable for them for life and could never be with me as a partner. Deception, fraud and lies and lies and more lies!
He told me he loved me and that I was only thing that made him happy. So much for the only thing that made him happy. Now he is willing to leave that and go back to his country. He said he is a pushtun, a tribe in Afghanistan and people of his tribe honour their promises. Well he made a lot of promises to me but none of them have materialised!! He was just a big fat liar just like any other person. To hell with you Rafi Hottak.